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Time of Mercy Blog

 

Mutual responsibility

The bond between a man and a woman should be a bond of mutual responsibility.

To become the father of the Son of God was not easy for Joseph. Initially, he intended to dismiss/divorce Mary secretly, which indicates that he was experiencing a deep crisis.

A few words of explanation: marriages in Israel were contracted in two stages. First, there was a kind of engagement, with a promise of premarital chastity. After such a ceremony, Mary was already married, but lived with her parents. The second stage, proper marriage, is "living together." Then marriage is accomplished as described in Genesis: a man leaves his father and mother and clings to his wife, and the two of them become one body(Gen 2:24). Marriage was not an individual matter of two spouses, as it is often treated today, but a responsible social institution, binding two families together. Marriage was a creative bond. It was a responsible reception of the other person and the children born from this union. First, the husband had to prepare the house. Until he did not have it, he could not take the woman, and he could not unite with her to make them one flesh. Today, unfortunately, the opposite is often done. Young people first "love" each other, and then earn the rest, that is, they get married, look for a flat, etc. Sometimes the most important thing is missing, which proves that it has nothing to do with love, because it does not take into account responsibility for another person and for the child. It is just looking for your own pleasure.

The bond between a man and a woman should be a bond of mutual responsibility. If there is none, there is no love. Joseph found himself in a strange situation: the child was not his, so whose? He could not tell people, "That's my child." If so, a simple conclusion was that Mary is an adulteress! The fate of adulteresses is shown in the eighth chapter of the Gospel according to John, when a woman "caught in adultery" was brought to the Lord Jesus and they wanted to stone her, according to the Law (cf. Jn 8:1-11). Joseph reacted differently: his first reaction was to flee, presumably to blame himself. In this way he wanted to protect Mary. His primary concern grew out of the question, "How do I save you?"

In response, he received a dream that the child is a blessing from God, that He is His child. Through Him the salvation of God's people [the name Jesus means "Jehovah saves"] will take place. Then St. Joseph accepted Jesus with full responsibility as his son.

A child is a great gift, a mystery – God gives us someone to participate in the act of creating man. Someone who is free, rational, who is a person, the subject of own actions – the greatest work of God. Man is not born ready, but he is developing until he dies. Childhood has a fundamental influence. The new man is a mystery, he is not the property of his parents, because he is always a child of God, but parents have a huge influence on his formation.

Woman is the first to be drawn into the mystery of the creation of the new man. She is alone with this mystery for some time. Others, especially the husband, are from the outside. Then there is the need for them to accept a new man who has been conceived. Today's problem of abortion is most often the lack of such acceptance.


Fatherhood, unlike motherhood, has above all a spiritual dimension. The father is the one who receives a woman with a child. He builds them a house; he is the pillar of this house and the guardian of the mystery of the birth of a new man. He is a co-worker of God – responsible for the safety and acceptance of the family. Joseph accepts a child who is Emmanuel, that is, "God with us", that is, with those who accept Him. Whoever accept aChild is accepted by God. In this way, Joseph, who was not the natural father of Jesus, became a model father in the spiritual dimension: the one who, in the name of God, welcomes the child and his mother, caring for them.

Every person is a gift from God. First and foremost, we are a gift to ourselves. Are we able to accept this gift? Similarly, the husband is a gift to the wife and the wife to the husband. Together, they are a gift from God. Do they accept this gift from one another? The basis for receiving a gift is the experience of being accepted as a gift in the family. When a person does not experience such a reception, he himself has great difficulty in accepting others as a gift. Such a wound can only be healed by God, who is our Father, who loves us and gives us absolute acceptance.

The whole mystery of the gift is contained in the Eucharist, it is communion with God who is with us. Can we accept these gifts with thanksgiving, responding with a full voice: Amen


Until Tomorrow

fr. george

George Bobowski